Approval Addiction: How to break free and live the life of your dreams

All of us love to please our family, friends, and the close ones in our social circles. We like being appreciated and recognized. It releases the feel good-chemical dopamine and puts us in a happier place. But, seeking approval of people around you for everything in your life is another thing. Especially so, if their approval defines your self-worth.

Ask yourself these questions:-

Do people’s perception about you changes the way you live?
Does their approval of who you are and what you do influence your choices and decisions?
Do you have trouble saying no to people even if it means compromising on your own values and agenda?
Does saying yes to people makes you feel guilty, resentful and sad?
If you answer the above questions in an affirmative, you are a prey to approval addiction.
Approval addiction can make you do things that go against your personality and life’s vision. Though you might please those around you, you know that you are living a lie. It will make you feel extremely unhappy and empty inside.

Break free of the approval cycle
What would you like better? To live as per the approval of others or to live at your own free will?
It is your right to be able to be who you really are. To choose your beliefs and values. To do what is right for you, using your intuition and conscience. It is the only way to realize your potential and create your worth. There are no two ways about it.
Here is how you can teach yourself to not seek any external validation and break-free of the approval addiction:

  • It’s impossible to please everyone

This is a fact. Different people think, behave and react differently. They have different aspirations, values and goals. You cannot please them all. All you can do is to please yourself by walking the path that aligns with your vision. Just do that.

  • Say ‘No’ when you have to
    You don’t always have to agree with everything. We understand the difficulty involved in saying ‘No’ to your friends and family. But it is even more unfair to say a ‘Yes’ just to gain their approval, even though it does not relate with who you are and your life’s goals.
  • Approve yourself
    Do you approve of yourself? Do you think that you are doing the right things in the right way? Who do you really want to be? Analyse yourself. Once you accept and love yourself for who you are and what you think and do, the need for external approval fades away.